


I’m Okay, But I Went To See The Doctor Yesterday

by Anonymous



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Gen, Is it a songfic if only one line of song is mentioned, No Beta, No Beta We Post Recklessly, Not Beta Read, Post-Break Up, Radio Interview, Reylo - Freeform, Singer/Songwriter Rey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:22:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25331626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Rey and Ben broke up months ago.She’s been MIA to the fans and the rest of the world since.She’s just broken her silence with a new single and is doing her first interview since going into hiding.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren Mentioned
Comments: 3
Kudos: 30
Collections: Anonymous





	I’m Okay, But I Went To See The Doctor Yesterday

**Author's Note:**

> This is, I think, my first published work since I was in high school! Please be kind and spare some comments or kudos if you liked it!
> 
> I don’t have a Beta, so any mistakes you see are my own.
> 
> I was inspired by a radio interview I listened to done by Halsey and also a song that Gerard Way featured on years ago.

“First of all, I have to say, on behalf of the whole studio, we are so excited to have you here,” Lando schmoozed with a charming grin.

“It can’t be anywhere as excited as I am to be here, honestly. When I was told you wanted me to come on I was in shock,” Rey buzzed back with a toothy grin. “You and Han Solo and the entire Millenium Falcon group were a huge part of what made me want to pick up a guitar and also maybe a cape.” 

Rey blushed and gave a self-conscious laugh. 

“I’m sure you hear that all the time though,” she said with a wave of her hand.

“Well, half the time it’s not from anyone as pretty as you, my dear. As soon as we heard the single drop though, we knew we wanted you here,” the man charmed back.

“So, it’s been about a year and a half since your album dropped. What have you been up to in your down time?” Lando asks directly.

“Oh, well, a lot of things really. Before the studio work and album I was living in Jakku and the work of getting my album and singles out there and doing all I can to get my name out there left me with no time to explore Chandrila once I’d been transplanted, so I’ve been doing that. A lot of incognito touristy stuff in disguise. I’ve been attempting to learn to cook for myself,” she explained with enthusiasm.

“So you could come over and cook me a five star meal is what I’m hearing,” the caped man joked.

“Not quite. But I can try, one day I’ll get there,” she replied with a laugh. “No kitchen fires yet though!”

“So cooking and exploring, anything else?”

“I’ve also been working on an old car in my garage. I was a mechanic for a while before I’d really gotten anywhere with music, just to pay the bills, and I still really enjoy getting under the hood of a car and getting it up and running like new,” she said in return.

“Cooking, singing, being your own mechanic. All you could ever need in one lovely package,” Lando said with a grin stretching across his handsome face.

“I’m assuming you’ve also been writing, any word on another album and when that might happen?” He asked with a sly tone.

“Nothing yet, but I promise you’ll know when it happens,” she laughs.

“All right, I’m holding you to that Rey. Now tell us about this new single, my dear,” Lando segued. 

Rey wiggled in her seat a bit in equal parts excitement and nerves. It had been a year and a half since her first album dropped and here she was dropping a single, a random single unattached to anything, just because she wanted to. Because she could now. And millions of people will hear it.

This was also her first interview since the single dropped. She hadn’t talked to anyone else about it and wasn’t planning to but when Finn and Rose passed the invitation along to her she couldn’t say no. 

She couldn’t lie though and say she wasn’t hoping this would be her gateway to bringing Ben back. Maybe. She was still a little messed up but all she knew was that six months without him was awful.

“Oh, gosh, it has been so, so amazing to be able to just put this single out there for people to hear. Just because I can. Because I wanted to get the words out. It’s surreal,” the freckled girl gushed into the mic.

“It is a great one, and much different from what we’ve heard from you before. It walks a fine line between softer and more edgy. A good mix of the two,” Lando replied.

“Oh, it’s one of the best things I’ve done in the last few months,” Rey replied while pushing a wayward curl out of her face. “I wrote it, and at the time, it wasn’t meant to be soft. It was written from a vulnerable part of me. It was moody and angry and never meant to see the light of day, to be honest.”

“You’re no stranger to moody and angry though with what we’ve seen in the past,” the man tossed back at her with the raise of an eyebrow.

“That’s true but this was different. So much of what I’d written had to do with people long gone. I could say something and not own up to personal consequences in the same way as I would with someone still in my life,” she explained. This single was her heart on the line, her message into the universe saying, please come get me, I’m ready. Rey fiddled with the wiring on her headphones. 

“So, this single has direct consequences then?”

“In a way. When I was writing, it started as a message to myself, as a way to say why did you do this to yourself? Why open yourself up to more pain? But then when I started laying down the track it evolved. It became a message to someone, me going look, I’m saying I love you, even after all this time,” she stumbled out. It felt rushed and overly simple in comparison to how she felt in her head and her heart but it was the best she was going to get it out without a prewritten script. 

“So, why a single? Why not save it for the next album?” Lando asked curiously.

“It was important to get it out there into the universe. So that hopefully it gets heard by the people who need to hear it,” she answered with a small grin. “And I’ve always been terribly impatient.”

“You’ve gone pretty simple and repetitive in terms of structure this time around, and your sound is much dreamier, which lends it a softer, more romantic sound which contrasts with lines like, ‘falling in love will kill you,’” Lando 

  
“Yes, well, we all know it’s a bit of hyperbole. Love won’t actually kill you, the act of falling in love won’t kill you, but it still hurts. I’m sure most of us have felt its keen sting, Shakespeare has Romeo saying after all that love is a heavy burden and it pricks like a thorn,” Rey answers sheepishly. “This song for me, by the end, was my way of saying, it’s worth it. The hurt and the thorns and the possible killing.”

“So is there some romance in your life then that we and the listeners are unaware of?” Lando had looked almost lackadaisical up until now. Now that there was some dirt to uncover he was laser focused on her and it made the muscle under her left eye twitch a bit. He was looking for a scoop, that was easy enough to see.

“Well, Lando, I don’t have anyone right now. It could change though, who knows,” she replied carefully. “I’m hoping for the best.”

She was hoping for Ben. Lando was part of the Organa-Solo-Chewbacca circus that was Ben’s family. There was no way he didn’t know that her and Ben had been together. Or that they had broken up. 

According to Rose’s husband, Hux, who was Ben’s assistant and best friend, after they broke up Ben immediately dove into his next project and had yet to come up for air. She was sure he had written page upon page of angst ridden poetry that directed his anger at her. At the time, Rey had been overwhelmed. It was too much all at once.

She was finishing up her tour, trying to do long-distance with Ben, doing interviews and appearances, and also dealing with being homesick but not feeling like she could tell anyone. She was living the dream after all; touring, having an award winning first album, adoring fans wearing her face on a tee shirt, it was what she had worked for. As well as a boyfriend who loved her enough to wait at home while she toured the world, even though it’s what he hated about his father growing up.

When Ben had asked her to marry him when she was finally home her brain panicked. Her mind immediately went to all the wrong places; he would hate being married to her, he would resent her job, he would would leave her one day, he would want her to quit and settle down and have babies immediately, he would hate her travelling so much. All things that logically she knew were nothing like him. It didn’t stop her from shutting him out though. From breaking both their hearts. 

She just hoped he got the message she was putting out into the world just for him. For the entire world to hear how she felt for him.

“Well, then I hope that whoever your message is for gets to hear it. It’s a hell of a way to get someone’s attention,” Lando replied with a laugh. “Thanks for coming to hang out with me and my listeners for a bit, I know you haven’t done any other press since the single dropped.”

“It was absolutely my pleasure. I couldn’t say no when they said it was you. I hope you all enjoy listening to the single, it’s available for streaming and download everywhere now, I think,” Rey said in return. “Thanks for your well wishes too. I know I’m keeping my fingers crossed that they hear it.” She grinned brightly. 

It was a relief to have talked about it somewhat with the public. It was a weight off of her shoulders that she didn’t know she needed rid of. She had been keeping her head down for the last few months and staying inside her house. It was too hard dealing with her heartbreak and also worrying about her public appearances when she just wanted to lay about and wallow. 

Getting even just a small amount of this off her chest was freeing. Hopefully Ben understood what she was trying to say. It was the only way to get her words to him since he had blocked her on everything.

“Well, that’s it for now Cloud City. We hope you enjoyed our afternoon conversation with Rey. Here’s her new single, “Falling In Love Will Kill You,’” Lando signed off. He queued up her song on his computer and then they were done. 

Rey was ready to just be in love and be with Ben. She just hoped he was ready too.

**Author's Note:**

> Here’s the Halsey interview I was inspired by:  
> https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=s2SPmnrSe8A
> 
> Here’s the Gerard Way/Wrongchilde song I have this Rey dropping as her single:  
> https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=I1YkvfMXlwg


End file.
